Spot the Difference

By Catherine O’Brien

I want it back. I want our lives when they were diaphanous conversations custom-made for two. I want the acoustic, stripped back version of myself, the self I was around you. I miss our bouts of euphoric laughter that frequently went on the run. I want to be reinstated in my capacity as the life jacket that you could have worn at all times. I wish I had fastened you to my open, untrodden heart. I was foolish not to fade to black other concerns.

It confounds me how much I miss you. I look through photo albums and sip the sweet lemonade of their sparkling memories. I use the memories to self-medicate as I attempt to clear the knot that aches the pain of your loss. They are never enough to allow my feet to clear the ladder of thought with its missing rung of you.

Catherine O’Brien is an Irish writer of poems, flash fiction and short stories. She writes bi-lingually in both English and Irish. Her work has appeared in print and online in Iris Comhar, Idle Ink, The Raven Review, Virtual Zine and other fine publications. She holds a Ph.D. in English Literature. Her work has recently appeared or is forthcoming in Janus Literary, Splonk, Flash Boulevard, Loft Books, Ellipsis Zine and more. You can find her on Twitter @abairrud2021.